Francesca Bas
First of let me start by saying how much I admire and am proud of you, starting your recovery and seeking help is not easy it is the bravest and most worth it thing you can do.
My name is Francesca Bas I was diagnosed with Anorexia Nervosa at 15, although I also struggled with Bulimia and Orthorexia. My road to recovery was rocky, it felt like nothing was working, I was stuck. These are 10 things which made recovery a little easier and help me heal.
If you want to know more about me you can find my full story under “Story of Hope”.
1. Separating from ED
You are not your disorder. For so long I believed I was my diagnosis, I wasn’t Francesca, no I was anorexia and the environment around me boosted this idea. Until one day my therapist said these words, “you are not your disorder” WHAT!! When she said this to me, I felt a weight was lifted, suddenly healing became a lot easier because I knew I was not my disorder. How are you supposed to heal from something when you believe it is the core of your identity? You cannot, this is why separating yourself from your ED can be so helpful. Do a little exercise with me close your eyes and visualize your ED, what does it look like, feel like, now give it a name and visually send it to a chair, this is a visual that helped me a lot to create the separation because ED now carries its own identity.
2. find your whys for recovery
Why do you want to recover? We need to find reasons that will support you on your hardest days, and remind you why you truly want to recover even when its extra hard. Here are some of the whys I wrote when I was recovering and put in my closet where I could see them each day.
• Because I want to experience joy
• Because I want to have kids one day
• Because I want to feel energy again
• Because I want to be present with the people I love
• Because I don’t want to die
• Because I want to go on Adventures
Any why is a good why, just try and keep away from appearance based, these can be triggering and not very helpful.
3. support team
When recovering from an eating disorder it is crucial to have a support team. Recovery is hard work having people who want to help you surrounding is extremely helpful. This team looks a little different for everyone, however some important spots to be filled are: a therapist, doctor, dilatation and support from friends or family.
4. Media cleanse
Cleanse your devices from anything that may be triggering. This may be photos that remind you of when you were struggling a lot or a different size, people you may follow, toxic apps you may have as well as old photos which may be triggering to you.
Go on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok whatever you like to use and unfollow any accounts which feel triggering in any way, you do not have to justify why you are unfollowing if it feels unsafe unfollow. Setting your social media to serve you and impact you positively is a very helpful tool. Substitute these accounts for counts that support and empower you instead.
5. One day at a time
Often fear and anxiety lie in the past and future “but I ate this earlier” “ I’ll have to go to this dinner later” “I didn’t do well enough yesterday”… rarely are these thoughts about the present so try and take it one moment at a time for instance if you are eating a meal try to stay on that one meal focus on the colors, the taste and if you need a little distraction that is totally fine too watch one of your favorite youtubers or a feel good show but try and keep your mind from spiraling to worries of the past and present.
6. Stop body checking
Body checking can include measuring yourself, saving clothes that no longer fit you, touching certain areas of your body etc. Body checking brings us to a place of anxiety where healing and balance becomes more difficult.
7. Maybe it’s not as hard as you think
Recovery is hard, however sometimes we build up stories so vibrantly in our heads we make it even harder for ourselves. For example, has there ever been a day where you plan to conquer a fear food, but then you spend so much time and energy thinking about how its going to play out, how you’re going to react, how you’re going to feel and it gets so overwhelming that trying the fear food becomes nearly impossible? Try to remind yourself it might not be as hard as you think. Sometimes these fear foods, these new experiences are extra hard because we build them up to be so for instance, I remember I was immensely scared of cake and when I had caked my day was ruined I was so down. I believe this brought me down so dramatically because I had spent the prior day and a half worrying. Worrying about how I will feel, what it will do to me, worrying about how my ED would react, worrying about any bad thing my ED could cling on to.
The next time I took on a fear food was a pastry and this time I tried to go in with saying “you know it might not be as scary as I think” and you know what it wasn’t. It definitely wasn’t easy but it wasn’t as scary as I usually would have built it up to be. This was how I then continued to tackle fear foods through my recovery.
8. Self soothing
Sometimes when the anxiety is high it can be really helpful to do some little self-soothing techniques to calm down and ease the anxiety. Some techniques I’ve found helpful include:
· Finger tapping: “Tapping on certain points of the body such as fingers, sends signals to the amygdala, the fight-or-flight part of the brain, to calm down and relax. As soon as this happens, anxiety is reduced. This also helps restore the body's energy to a balanced state.” (Fishwick 2019)
· Breathing: “When you breathe deeply, it sends a message to your brain to calm down and relax. The brain then sends this message to your body. Those things that happen when you are stressed, such as increased heart rate, fast breathing, and high blood pressure, all decrease as you breathe deeply to relax.” (P, Burgess et,al 2020)
· Distractions: Sometimes when we feel overwhelmed some distractions can help feel safer and calmer, this could include watching your favorite movie, talking with a friend, going on a walk. Whatever may be a good distraction for you
9. Move your body kindly
I remember when I was in the pit of my eating disorder I moved my body for the wrong reasons. I worked out, hiked, danced all with the aim to change my body. If this is you this is something which may keep you stuck in your eating disorder. It’s important to move our body with joy, because we want to, because it feels good. Not for a specific body image outcome or compensating behavior. I know how hard this switch can be and maybe a part of your recovery as was mine means ditching sports for a while to first build a steady foundation with yourself and your recovery and then reintroduce gentle movement.
10. celebrate the little victories
We often realize the defeats, when we don’t feel we have done as well as we should have but we rarely put this much attention on the good, what we have done great. When we celebrate our wins big or small, we are left feeling supported and encouraged to continue going. What’s a small win you’ve made today? Think about one and thank yourself tell yourself “good job I’m proud of you”.
When you make it a habit to acknowledge when you’re doing well you will notice less and less hard days.
I know it’s hard because usually us folks who struggle with eds like and seek for perfections and so, recovery has to be perfect too, but it won’t be: recovery is messy, it’s hard it might leave you with tears but it’s the best decision I’ve made! My worst days in recovery have been better than my best days in my ed.
Article written by: Francesca Bas ISA Power intern
life is worth recovery
Sources:
Fishwick, S. (2020). https://kujss.iraqjournals.com/pdf_166170_8dd024058ce4abb6c364bec514cecef8.html. Kirkuk University Journal-Scientific Studies, 15(2), 1–16. https://doi.org/10.32894/kujss.2019.15.2.1
Burgess, P. (n.d.). Health Library. Health Library | Michigan Medicine. https://www.uofmhealth.org/health-library/uz2255.
