This article was written by Tessa, Volunteer at ISA Power
The step has finally been taken. The most courageous step that can be taken. You ask for help. Or maybe you ask for help for someone close to you who still finds this step too difficult. Either way, asking for (and accepting) help is the start to recovery.
All the while you thought you were going to make it on your own and that it would go away on its own. The eating disorder can control you to such an extent that this seems reality, that you actually believe it yourself and continue to postpone any help. It takes so much courage and honesty to tell someone you know it won't go away on its own.
You’re eating disorder will speak to you; “How weak that you cannot do it alone. Others can't help you, they don't understand you anyway. In a while you will really stop. It's not that bad. What do you expect. ”
Maybe you’re eating disorder speaks to you in a different way. However, you are addressed. the eating disorder just wants to make you insecure. The eating disorder is afraid of losing you. The fact that you have taken the step to ask for help. You don't want this anymore. You don't want to live by the rules of the eating disorder anymore. You want to be free! Be proud of yourself! Asking for help is very strong. You listen to your heart, what you want, and not the will of the eating disorder.
Unfortunately, the will you have can be thwarted by the long waiting lists. The doctor will tell you that it is wise to seek professional help, you may be referred to a clinic. After you have had your first meeting with a pounding heart, you will be told that you cannot immediately start treatment. Fright! You might not have expected that at all! Just when you had gathered all the courage and the feeling that you were really ready for it now. How should you continue to follow it in the coming months? Your good hope is immediately wiped out.
Unfortunately, the long waiting times are all too common. On average, waiting times at mental health institutions and clinics vary from a few weeks to a few months. Often the reasons are; staff shortage and too few places (see source 1). Young people in particular need to be very patient. On average, young people wait about 10 weeks for help. First four weeks for an intake and then 6 weeks for a first session. In practice, however, it often happens that the waiting times can sometimes last from months to a year. Municipalities receive money from the government to care for young people up to the age of eighteen within the municipality. Unfortunately, there are also significant cuts in youth care, which means that too few specialist treatments are purchased. But the waiting lists for psychological help for adults are also long (see source 2). The long waiting lists are worrisome. It is important that appropriate help is provided as soon as possible with psychological complaints. The sooner this help comes, the greater the chance of recovery.
The most important thing for the period when you are waiting for help is to share your feelings and thoughts. It can make you angry, or it may take away your motivation for recovery. "Then they'll figure it out too," "Then let it be," these thoughts feed your eating disorder and can cause you to retreat back into your own world. On the other hand, it can also feel like a relief. The eating disorder can continue for a while. Please do not be tempted by the thoughts that you can now just lose "extra" weight, eat a lot or perform other destructive actions. Immediately try to see the step you took to ask for help as a new way. You go for it! With or without waiting list, your recovery starts now!
As difficult as it is, try to maintain the will to recover. Try to gain strength from the feeling that deep down you want to be free again. Ask a loved one in your area to support you in bridging this difficult time with you. Maybe you can work out some sort of plan together to ensure that the situation does not deteriorate in the near future. Investigate whether there are other (short-term) possibilities in your environment that can give you some relief in the situation. It may be an option to seek (interim) help from separate practices, care providers or agencies. They often do not have waiting lists, so you will get the help you are looking for in the meantime. You can also always talk to your doctor. This can help you to provide other forms of help or support if you have to wait a long time (see resource 2).
In addition, you can use the coming period to list everything you encounter for yourself. The more you write down about yourself, your actions and thoughts, the better your practitioner will be able to help you later. A treatment is always an interaction between the practitioner and yourself. The practitioner alone cannot cure you, he or she can only provide you with the tools to get started yourself. The more you open up and share about what is going on in you, the faster your recovery can go.
What helped me a lot is to organize and write down all my complaints. Sometimes my thoughts were so mixed up and it was a jumble of complaints and problems that I could not organize. Many things had a connection, but in my head it was a great chaos. What may seem and feel small to you, may be of great significance during your treatment. Try to be honest and not be ashamed. A practitioner will not judge and will be grateful for your courage to be open. By putting everything on paper, you have a kind of overview during your intake and therapy with which you can possibly link certain complaints, thoughts and feelings. When you can make connections for yourself, it is easier to get the right treatments or help. You can also always talk to your doctor. This can help you to provide other forms of help or support if you have to wait a long time (see resource 2.)
Be proud, hold on and don't give up! Even if it will take a while, the most important thing is that you have taken the step. The step to freedom, in your head, in your body, in your heart
2. source: https://www.npo3fm.nl/nieuws/tussenuur/375407-waarom-zijn-de-wachtlijsten-in-de-ggz-eigenlijk-zo-lang
